Nostalgia..

Well, I knew the day would come but I didn't realize it would come so soon. Here I am listening to some sappy nostalgic songs (Amie by Damien Rice if you want to feel the sadness like I am right now). Ok now that you're listening to a great song for these kind of feels, here I go.

As my time in Germany comes to an end, I mostly want to be sure that I don't forget the things that I learned here. Being abroad taught me some valuable lessons, both academically and personally. It's true when people say that study abroad changes you!

One of the first things that I learned coming here is that no stereotype is 100% true. I was worried about Germans being very unhealthy. What I found instead was that my host family cooked EXTREMELY healthily and were in much, much better shape than me. I think being around them helped me learn how to take care of myself better physically. I tend to get worked up and stressed about school and not take the time to exercise and maintain my well-being. My host parents really focused on maintaining a balance between work and fun; they worked very hard during the week but went running in the forest every Saturday and other such activities. I am going home much more health-conscious, and hopefully will be eating clean and exercising more (after my chick-fil-a and macaroni and cheese binge of course).

Also, the stereotype about German people being "too direct" and kind of mean isn't true either. Yes, my host family was very direct. But I loved it! It's actually kind of silly that us Americans circumvent the heart of an issue instead of speaking our minds sometimes. I think being more direct has helped me be more assured of my worldview and opinions on things instead of taking an on-the-fence stance on important issues. My host family and I often had intense discussions about politics, theater, art, culture, food, or anything else. I like the German attitude toward art and theater as a teaching and awareness tool. We were talking about how a lot of the German theater mentality is to provoke a discussion (aka controversial). I think that's very interesting, but also typical of the German culture. I don't think there's anything mean about getting to the heart of an issue and trying to resolve it--I think it's very admirable! So that's what I learned about the German stereotype.

Ok, the stereotype about drinking beer is totally correct though. I'm going to miss causally ordering a beer with lunch. Or two. Fortunately all that healthy eating kept me from gaining too much weight!

About myself, this trip has taught me that it's ok to take risks because they often lead to something better than you could ever imagine. I was nervous to go on this trip because it was asking a lot of my parents (financially and worry-wise I think) and it wasn't the most economical way to accomplish the classes I needed to graduate. I went into the semester thinking I would hopefully just pull up my GPA, see a few cool buildings, then come home back to "reality". I was going to look into applying for nursing school this summer because I was worried about not being competitive enough to essentially do anything else in healthcare. However, this trip provided me with an opportunity to revisit my career plans and not sell myself short by picking nursing, which I was doing just because it was the program I felt that I was most likely to get into. I was able to interact with people--both Dr. Wasser and enmodes--who saw my potential beyond just a GPA and resume, and they have given me the extra boost that I need to start thinking outside of just nursing as a career. I'm coming back to Germany hopefully this summer to intern with enmodes, and maybe research is now in the picture for a career. I'm so glad that I took the risk to come on this trip, and took another risk to intern with enmodes. I think this will be an amazing learning experience that I never EVER could have had if I had not come to Germany.

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Today was a really fantastic way to end the trip.

I started the day with a pensive cup of coffee looking out the open window to the verdant garden. There are huge trees towering over budding bushes and vibrant flowers, and the clouds rushed overhead merrily. I walked my usual route from my house to the Zentrum a little slower than usual, drinking in the beautiful springtime and the Rhine. When I got to the Zentrum, I met up with Hazel and we finally toured the Beethovenhaus, which was really incredible. I love how seeing the actual places that famous composers, artists, scientists, and historical figures were--it really makes history come alive!

Then, we went to the AIB for our final "classtime". We shared memories from the trip. A random tag-a-long person on our very first trip together (Frankfurt to Bonn). Running into a buoy with our raft because we didn't know how to steer. Our kick-ass dance at the beginning of the semester. The Dr. Schnabel tour in Vienna. And my own memories were rushing through my head: accidentally riding to the trainyard on one of the first days. Runs along the Rhine. Talking nonstop about cute dogs we saw (mostly with Ryan, Hazel, or Koi). Randomly getting currywurst or Dean&Davids for lunch. Our BIMS dance party during finals. There were so many amazing moments within the program, but what truly made this semester great was being with friends. I'm equally grateful for the small moments as the big ones.

After saying our official goodbyes (even though I'll see a lot of people on the bus tomorrow), Ryan, Koi, Garrett, Mitchell and me decided to do a "Bonn in Retrospect" tour. We went to the Bonnch Restaurant and grabbed a Bonnch outside, basking in the sunshine and enjoying good conversation. Then, we went to Tuscalo for one last Beethoven pizza, which is probably the best pizza I've ever eaten. Spinach, cheese, roast beef, chicken, and truffle oil. Thin crust, hand tossed. And bananan weitzen, which is banana beer. It's amazing. Then I went shopping for a few souvenirs, walked home again, and now I'm sitting here listening to sad music and admiring the fact that I actually fit everything into my luggage...

Tomorrow, Ryan and I will spend the day in Frankfurt, then we will fly out on Wednesday. Hopefully between now and when I get home I will have some blog posts to fill in the past few weeks. I would recommend never falling behind on blogging ever because it's so much to talk about and my fingers get tired. But it's totally worth it. I'm glad I have something to look back on about my trip.

I can't believe I'm packing...

It seems like we just got here yesterday...

If you had told me in January I would be sad about leaving in May I would have thought you were crazy because I was sure it was going to be a long four months away from my family. I do miss them a lot and I am so glad to get to go home and see them but Bonn has become another home to me in the time I have been here. I spent most of last night sorting through things and beginning the packing process. I'm taking home a lot of good memories and hope that someday soon in the future I will be bringing my family here to make some more. There have been a lot of tears today, and I'm sure there will be a lot more tomorrow.

Now the anxiety of going home has started to creep in. I know this four months has changed me in some ways I've already realized and others I'm sure I'll come to recognize soon enough but how are the changes in me going to affect my family. My brother will be on the ground in North Carolina sometime around 11pm my time here in Germany tonight after a nine month deployment. I wonder if he is having some of the same emotions. I'm also anxious about what is to come in the next few months. My father will be having his prostate removed in dealing with his cancer on June 23rd and then my husband will also be needing surgery to fix some vertebrae issues in his neck after I return.

So for now it's back to packing... I'm sure things will be crazy for a bit when I get home. I just never thought it would be so bittersweet.

Aachen

Sun! I finally got to enjoy the sun. After we presented our device design project, we wandered around the city for food and the sun. Two of my friends were offered internship positions at enmodes. I got to just sit on the green grass and bask in the sun. Later, we toured the dom of Aachen and learned about its significance.

BIG EVENT

This is the second year I participated in big event. It was a great experience. We help with a farm style nature reserve for kids. We weeded and fixed benches for the people. We received Big event t-shirts and a hearty lunch for our service. Some of my friends entered into the Bonn marathon and ran a relay.

Dead week

This week was so crammed together, we spent time catching up with the homework and the biochemistry assignments. We getting closer to the project presentation, can't wait.

Paris Easter break

I went to Paris for the Easter break. It was rainy but it was fun. We spend all day in the Louvre museum. We saw the Mona Lisa, a lot of statues, and paintings. My group seen the Eiffel tower every day. The second day, we went to Versailles and saw room of mirrors where they signed treaty of Versailles. The last day we spent our time at the tower of triumph.

Spring Break Part 2: Barcelona

 After a lovely few days in Coppet, me and Amy flew to Barcelona and met up with some of the other people. I went to Barcelona on a vacation when I was 16 and all the things we planned to do, I had already done. That was okay though, because it's such a pretty city and when I was 16 I was almost 100% unaware to all thoughts other than "Is that edible? Can I eat that? When is the next time I will play a video game?". I remember when I had gone before I had zero understanding of how to get anywhere and just followed my family around. However, this time, everything made so much sense and I had no trouble knowing sort of where I was at all times. We saw the Picasso museum, which was actually MORE interesting to me this time around. It was cool to compare my thoughts between now and when I had seen it a few years ago. I experienced the same thing at the Sagrada Familia. Obviously, it's a very impressive place and it's sort of the main thing to see in Barcelona. I was expecting to walk in and be like "Oh yeah this old thing, I've already seen it". That was not the case at all. I was still just as impressed, maybe even more impressed, as I was back then. I don't know why. I think it's because I have a better understanding of the world now (but not enlightened in any sense of the word) and I think that allowed me to see it in a different light. Literally, because the sun was angled in such a way that the light was coming in completely colored and that wasn't the case last time. It was very cool. Another day, we went to the Gaudi park, which I hadn't seen before. I enjoyed that a lot. It had some really cool architecture and some really great views of the city. It was a funny day because it rained all morning, stopped when we left the apartment, started again while we ate, stopped when we were in the park, then started as we were trying to get home. Overall, it was a nice trip. The weather was at least a little bit warmer than it had been everywhere else, I understood what was going on, and I enjoyed just about everything that happened.